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Spiritual Dating

I have remained single pretty much since my spiritual divorce in 1995. I had one boyfriend for a few months in 1999. I tried dating services, including eHarmony for a couple of years, and was terribly mismatched over and over again. There was one gentleman from eHarmony, who came to see me from Canada. We discovered that the chemistry wasn’t there after meeting in person. That was January of 2006.

Spiritual ladies and gents, I believe we are so different from mainstream that the classic styles of dating just don’t fit us. Even the old-fashioned set ups can be so awkward. Bars are out of the question for most of us. E-dating is like the personals used to be in the paper, but with photos and emails and time management issues. Ugh.

Here’s how it happened:

On one of my many busy weekend catch up days, with piles of “to do” on my desk, I stumbled upon www.PlentyofFish.com on a Sunday afternoon. It was Sunday, January 25, to be precise. Within 2 days I had 7 or 8 interested guys (honestly, lost count and had to start printing their profiles and writing notes on them) and a first date on Wednesday with another first date on Saturday.

When we would get to the “let’s talk on the phone” stage, I would first send them a link to my website and ask if they were okay with what I did for a living. Ha ha! Some guys freaked when they saw my title, “Reverend”. Some dropped off the planet without another email. Still, more men followed until I finally made my profile invisible . . . see why later.

Now, I’ve already tried plenty of dating sites, and geez, I just don’t like the dating process. I am comfortable IN a relationship, but how does one get there without dating? I decided to just be brave and keep plodding along. I posted 4 photos of me, all smiling and recent pics, and boldly said I was a business owner looking for just the right man, and voila! I found him within the first week.

So many men, so little time:

Of course, I was enjoying the attention of several men, so I took my time. At least it seemed like I was taking my time. Within 2 weeks, I had it narrowed down to 2 most likely matches. Both of them were great and I was torn! On February 12, prospect number one and I met in person. He managed to squeeze in 2 more long distance dates by private aircraft before I could meet prospect number two in person on February 22. Hum. Nice radar. I didn’t tell them about each other, as I was waiting for the chemistry, or not.

While number two is a really wonderful guy, it turned out that he wasn’t the right match for me. I would gladly set him up with any of my girlfriends because he’s a great catch. Are you fishing? Let me know. Number two gave me the gift of realizing that I was ready for interdependence and really, really done with independence. Yes, I’m a strong woman, who can RV all by herself, fill the tires with air, pull a spark plug, etc, but I’m done with that phase. I clearly don’t need a partner. I want a partner with whom I can share life.

Mystical experiences:

While having get-to-know-each-other conversations with number two, something far more mystical was happening with number one that I just couldn’t ignore. I could hear him talking to me in the middle of the night. I could smell him from time to time during the day. We both pondered having met in this lifetime, but realized that we hadn’t and it must be past life familiarity. Then I had a couple of visions of his face in other incarnations. No other memories, just his face and surroundings.

We are now exclusively dating each other, and taking our time building the relationship. I’m convinced that Spiritually-based people, especially Clairsentients like me, need to spend the time building the friendship.

Modern long-distance dating:

I can’t imagine myself dating in the same style that I did in my teens, 20’s or even 30’s. There needs to be the magic of a Soul connection, the depth of past life familiarity, and well, video Skype sessions for just a minute or two several times per day. That’s how we are making the long distance thing work for now. We talk and see each other on Skype, we have cell phones with the same company so we get free minutes, and we send romantic emails and keep making plans for our next meeting. Wow! I’m happy!

Wasn’t too busy after all:

Oh, and our businesses are running along quite nicely. Why did I think I didn’t have time for this for so many years? Simply because I wasn’t ready until I had my big Five Oh and the epiphany about interdependence. He agrees that he wasn’t ready for me either until just recently. Finding each other – again with open hearts – it’s the best.

DK’s song in my head is currently “Signed, Sealed, Delivered, I’m Yours”!
  

6 Responses to “Spiritual Dating”

  1. Elana & Al Sunseri on 11 Mar 2009 at 10:56 pm #

    It was Fabulous reading your blog tonight!
    We are very happy to hear about your budding Interdependent romantic soul relationship journey!
    Reading about you finding each other makes us remember our beginnings together 6 years ago. Many Blessings! You deserve every happiness…
    Love, Elana & Al

  2. Laura Ainsworth on 12 Mar 2009 at 7:53 am #

    Ah Terri, 50 was one of my best years! No kidding. Good for you! I was wondering how you were doing. I guess the thing I miss most about not being on a live call every Wed is not hearing how you are progressing. I do recall the tax time…glad of resolution for you. Yes, I hear songs at times. I thoroughly appreciate DK’s humor. There seemed to be more conscious connection while editing. And yet he is right here now. Smiling with us both. Love ya, Laura

  3. Anna on 12 Mar 2009 at 8:01 am #

    Terri,

    It’s so true what you said about “our” kind of spiritual beings and “mainstream”. It can get pretty lonely. Many of my spiriual friends have found it hard to find LOVE.
    I think when I decided to come in this lifetime I said I won’t do it without love…I don’t need to have money, fame, etc,. But to love and be loved is like breathing to me, I need it. I don’t think I would have volunteered at this time without a promise of love in my life.
    And so it was delivered to me, in the kindest and most loving man. I was in my 20’s and traveling thru Boston on a school trip from Florida and he also was traveling thru…It was in his voice, that soul connection- like I found someone I had known forever. We didn’t live in the same place for the four years we dated. We would travel to see each other and at that time wrote many, many letters (no emails in the eighties).
    I remember early in our relationship, (in the eighties when the “New Age” movement took off) my first discussion with him was about a book I had just read…”OUT ON A LIMB” by Shirley McClaine. I told him how my heart chakra had literally opened (I felt a physical “pop” in my heart) when I read her book. He sat there and not only listened carefully, but asked me questions. It was so amazing that I could share something that was so “exposing” of myself and my spiritual journey.
    This year will mark our 20th wedding anniversary. When he’s not incarnating on this planet he works with the OP&G (Outer Planets and Galaxies) and I work with the Angelic Realms. He brings humor and I bring depth, it’s a great balance that has worked for us.
    I think LOVE is humanities grace while we’re here, it makes life easier and much lighter!

    Blessing to you Terri on your LOVE connection! ENJOY!
    Anna
    Tampa, FL

  4. Lori on 17 Mar 2009 at 7:30 pm #

    Oh Terri,

    It was so exciting reading your blog. You represent so many people in the frustration of dating, yet, wanting to be IN a relationship. I loved the “interdependence” piece and I know what you mean. I am thrilled that you met a man who can meet your standards!!! YEAH TERRI

  5. Barbara Wascom on 28 Mar 2009 at 10:04 am #

    Tashi Delek Dear Terri,
    I just read your blogs and am so happy to see how you have grown over these years. NOW you are ready for interdependence with a loving companion and partner!
    Love and many blessings, Barbara

  6. Ken Barclay on 10 Aug 2009 at 9:36 am #

    I’ve had an extremely hard time with this. The few serious relationships I’ve had ended in disaster. I always figured I was spirtually different then most women I meet, so I do not even date anymore and I’m content with that. I figure if I meet some one I’ll know if its right or not, but at the same time I miss interdependence. Do Think I should suck it up and go out and date anyway so I know when I meet the right women? At this point in my life, its been almost 4 years since I’ve been on a real date and I fear I’m out of pratice. Let me know what you think. -Ken

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